Are you someone who wants to see the world as a different place? Do you complain about how bad the world is, how the people around you are deceptive and corrupt? Do you desire harmony and balance and love? Do you try to find something to fulfill that desire? Have you found something to fill that void?
It seems I have been searching to fill that void from very young. I have gone from being depressed, to complaining, judging others and criticizing them. That did not bring me satisfaction. I have gone to retreats, study groups, counseling and support groups. At these places, there were hints of ways to find that inner desire for something better. They did not fully fulfill my needs, as hearing others problems both gave the idea that I was not alone, and yet taking on others problems and solutions were not my route for finding that love that I desired.
I got a job and found personal satisfaction at times, but not total fulfillment. I had to continue to strive to be better, per my standards and I strove to satisfy the standards that were set upon me. Neither caused me to find that desired love. I got married and thought I found the person I wanted to live with for the rest of my life, thinking we were totally compatible and would grow to understand each other better daily. That turned out to be an illusion. I still struggle to connect with that person, to stand up for self as a respectable person, to communicate efficiently and to be received as a loving partner who is loved and loving unconditionally.
So where can we actually find that satisfaction that we seek. I now believe it is important to find it within ourselves. We need to seek for that hidden substance that is on the heart, full of desire to be happy and loved. I also believe that is written on the heart, but must be fully embraced body, mind, spirit and consciously. Sometimes, this can be given as a gift, and we can bypass some of the struggle. Sometimes, it is a constant struggle and we might be given the gift of perseverance to keep searching. Finding out who we are, choosing to love who we are and knowing we are loved by a creator is a healthy route to finding that true love. The process can challenge a person’s trust level. How much do we trust self and how much do we trust our God. Yes, we trust, but we also must not be helpless. Finding that tool that helps us love ourselves, because we have a God who loves us, is self defining. No one can take away that feeling of being fully embraced by someone bigger than anything we can imagine as a human. Finding satisfaction in ourselves, knowing that we are loved people of the Creator, who is perfect and we are not, is an awesome revelation that can cause us to either despair or to humbly embrace that grace. May people everywhere know that through our God, we are princes and princesses of the eternal kingdom if we are humble to repent, and ask for forgiveness and then able to receive the mercy of God. There is the bible quote: “Ask and you shall receive.”
If we truly love ourselves, then we are better able to love others.
Love is dying to self and giving all for the good of others, especially toward the work of salvation. May all who read this post find their special call to how they are called to love in this world.
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